I've been silent on here for a week or so. Mainly because life has been fairly hum drum. Nothing much happening between working and sleeping. However, there has been a hidden story line going on. With the end of my business there is the inevitable 'clean up' of everything. The most major of these of course was firstly getting a job and now paying off the debt.
Recently the bank called and we had a good chat. Out of that came the paperwork.
I had two weeks to complete a stat dec giving my current financial situation and a proposal on how I would like to pay the debt. This totally overwhelmed me. I just looked at it and thought about it... and looked at it some more.
Finally, realising I had to send it no later than last mail yesterday I started doing something with it on Monday. It is in the mail and should have been received today.
The interesting thing about this is the automatic behaviours within myself. I have been in situtations like this before where I come up against something that 'scares' me in some way and I procrastinate. In my mind it grows and becomes far greater spectre. However, the moment I make a start on it the spectre shrinks and shrivels until the job is done and is 'suddenly' non-existant.
Why do I do this? Why do I not learn this lesson?
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Generally the hardest part of every task is Starting. we kow that and even then it is hard to actually do it.
ReplyDeleteBreaking it into small bits so it isn't so scary and only doing a small bit at a time helps too. I recently discovered a timer so that I don't feel like I have to do too much at once. then when the timer goes off, i can stop and do something else (usually with the timer again) before going back to a little bit more.